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ISSN: 1094-2726
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New Hope International
Edited by Gerald England Reviewed by Gayle O'Brien At first glance, UK-based New Hope International isn't too impressive. The design looks like something even my grandmother could do, and the buttons are cheap and cheesy. But I was willing to give them the benefit of the doubt, hoping that the content would make up for a completely crappy design and layout. Bad news: NHI didn't redeem itself. Truly amazing poetry should convert those who don't give a damn about poetry into the most passionate of poetry lovers: NHI poetry made me run away screaming. Take for example, this one-sided conversation with a crow (names will not be cited here to protect the guilty): 'Your messageIs it just me or does that not make one iota of sense? Dear said poet: If it was stream of consciousness that led to this absurd comparison arriving on paper, then seek therapy. Crows aren't at peace where there is food. Crows eat roadkill, and in the process, sometimes became roadkill themselves. How can you be at peace when big, looming tractor-trailer trucks constantly interrupt your feast? Absurd. I won't even touch "past which is deep that I cannot recall." It's not even worth picking apart. It's hideous enough on its own. That passage alone made me want to log off in terror. But, alas, I had a review to write. I had to keep going. My next search cropped up three words. "Hope of Peace." Oy. Titles like "Hope of Peace" are always a bad sign. I felt so bad reacting in this way to what appears to be a collection of relatively heartfelt sentiments (and hey, I'm not a poet, but the difference between me and NHI contributors is that I have no delusions of grandeur) that I called in the big guns: I consulted a "real poet" (i.e. has been published in a number of "real" magazines and reviews, has a book published, and has never been published on NHI). Although she was no where near as harsh as I, she made a good point: "The 'zine is mediocre and a lot of the poetry is sentimental. There's a difference between sentiment, which can be good, and sentimentality, which is never good. Not in a poem, anyway. Makes it into a Hallmark card." I'm assuming, the poems chosen were supposed to be the better of the batch. What a waste of megabytes. The poetry was so bad, I was actually inspired to create some rhymes of my own. (We've already established that I'm not a poet, and I feel that if I'm going to trash a 'zine for its bad poetry, that I am obliged to produce some bad poetry of my own.) For NHI: Roses are red.I'm sorry, Gerald. I've seen your photo, and you look like a really nice bloke. In fact, your poem about Greta Garbo was great. Really. But I'd rather shove ice picks up my fingernails than be blinded by your sea-foam green background. I'd rather have lemon juice poured over a fresh wound than be tortured by the arrangement of words embedded into your HTML. Sorry. Maybe you're too nice - maybe you don't want to say 'No' to anybody. If that's the case, then on behalf of me, please congratulate yourself on being a Good Samaritan. If that's not the case...well... I'd better stop there. I can already feel the hate mail piling into my in-box. |
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New Hope International Editor: Gerald England Email: newhope@iname.com |
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please see our Review Suggestions page. Gayle O'Brien is anticipating lots of hate mail, and has chickened out of providing her e-mail address. When she's not being chicken, she can be found at home eating chicken. |
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