You might tell me something

he asked the black television

where did it all go?

Maybe the lamp knows

The curtains can surely tell me

Our dishware is immaculate

as are our toilet bowls

and one of you has to have the answer

I’ve been crawling on my hands and knees

picking the carpet thread by thread

but no one will tell me

maybe I’ll ask the car in the morning

on the way to work

or every other Friday at the bank

but GODDAMNIT

someone ought to know!

In my youth I hated all of you

my best friend was discontent

and my girlfriend was disdain

but I traded it all in for shiny linoleum

and the BCS title game

so I was just wondering

where did it all go?

and how do I get it back?